Is It Ever OK To Date Your Friend’s Ex?
One of the eternal questions that plague men all over the world is, what are the rules about dating your friend’s ex? Is there some kind of man code that says that once a woman has been claimed by a member of your pack there is no way another can ever date her down the road? Is there a time frame from when they dated that makes her totally off limits to you? Let’s say they dated for six months. Does that mean you need to wait around another six until you can do anything? Until he has another girlfriend? And what happens if this is your best friend’s girlfriend? What are the rules then? www.sunmatchservice.com
Let’s set the scenario: Your friend is dating an amazing girl. (And I’m talking about a real friend here, not a friend of a friend, a work friend or someone you see around who goes to all the same events as you.) The whole time your friend was dating this great woman, you always made sure to tell your buddy how lucky he was to have a woman like her. Every time you hung out with them in a group you guys really got along with each other. She was so cool. And all you kept thinking was, “Why can’t I meet somebody like her?”
Can You Date Your Friend’s Ex?
But now you’re in a predicament — they’ve broken up. To make things worse, she was the one who broke things off with your friend. Maybe he called you and told you; maybe you saw her out and, in the middle of another great conversation, she brought it up. So what do you do at this point? Is is OK to call her? Or maybe she’s started calling you.
Now that she’s single, you’re really thinking about this woman a lot. You start to develop feelings for her. You guys talk with each other and she tells you she’s starting to have feelings for you, too. At the same time, your friend still talks about her and wonders if he did something wrong to ruin the relationship. www.sunmatchservice.com
Now you’re in one of the biggest predicaments of your entire social life. You really want to start dating your friend’s ex, and she wants to go out with you. You want to start seeing her, and you have a very strong feeling that you two are really going to hit it off. What do you do in this situation?
How To Handle Your Friend’s Ex
There are a lot of guys out there who truly feel that once they’ve dated a woman she is off limits to all of his friends — no matter how long it’s been since they broke up. This is ridiculous thinking. We don’t own people; we just share our time with them. It’s your job to make the relationship that you have with her a great experience, and when that relationship comes to an end, you need to let her go. You had your time together and hopefully you created some great memories, but now it’s not your place to try to change and control anyone’s future or the way they want to live their lives.
I am somebody who truly believes that people are not possessions. I don’t care if it’s a casual acquaintance, I don’t care if it’s your best friend in the whole world, and I don’t care who broke up with whom. If I break up with someone — and I have broken up and been broken up with a lot — I have no problem with any of my friends dating my ex, falling in love with her and even marrying her. A great relationship, and great chemistry between two people, can be rare to come by. www.sunmatchservice.com
If you’re feeling a connection with someone, I firmly believe that you need to take every potential opportunity for finding a great person to be with. And if you’re the bystander, if you’re fuming because your friend is dating your ex who broke up with you, you need to realize that people are not your possessions. You may have shared something special with her in the past — and that’s something to cherish — but now it’s time to give your friend and your ex the freedom to do what they want without you in the picture.